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In order of publication, with the most recent listed first.

Questioning Authority

My sense of independence was challenged when I became a Christian and I started coming across all those pesky verses about obedience and trust and submission. Throughout its history the Christian church has tended to emphasize obedience over thinking.

But as I continued to study the Bible, I found a God who listens. A God of patience. A God who encourages us to use the brains He’s given us. So I’m sitting in church, struggling (as I often do) with the question of how to maintain both an openness to learning from others and a willingness to question whether what I’m hearing agrees with the Bible.


Are You Happy?

I’ve struggled to understand the biblical teaching about happiness versus joy (and gotten conflicting answers, none of which really satisfied me) for most of my Christian life. As a baby Christian in the early 1970s, I was surrounded by two conflicting messages: Happiness is just a brief response to worldly circumstances and therefore trivial in God’s eyes, BUT a Christian should always be happy.

Almost from the moment of my conversion, I treasured a growing sense of joy. During some recent difficult years, I noticed a sort of surprising kind of happiness. Life was hard, and yet I was happy much of the time. So I began to wonder: Is God only concerned about our joy, as I tended to think, or does He actually want us to be happy?


Yesterday

I’m so very weary. Every cell in my body is screaming, “I want another yesterday today!” The memory of the casual pace, the relaxation, and the peace is so fresh. The contrast with today is harsh. It’s tough living in this broken body.

This is My body which is broken for you… ~ 1 Corinthians 11:24 (NKJV). Those were Jesus’ words as He gave thanks and broke bread on the night that He was betrayed, warning His disciples of His coming death on the cross. He knows how it feels to be broken.

 

How Long?

When I’m hurting, when God seems so far away, I need to hear and voice the “How long?” of David’s psalms. But even when God’s turning the tables on me, when He’s asking me how long I’ll go on doubting Him in spite of the miracles I’ve seen, He’s doing it to draw me nearer to Him, to bring me to my best possible life.

 

Not My Mom

8 am. My phone rings. It’s Mom. She’s having a total meltdown. What do I do? What do I say?

How often do I go to God in a total meltdown? Crying, despairing, tantrumming. All because life isn’t going the way I thought it would. How does God respond

 

Growing Pains

I’m still growing. But it doesn’t look like I had imagined. Books and teachers could only take me so far. In addition to those resources, my loving, gracious Lord has placed me in difficult and painful circumstances beyond my ability to cope with apart from His compassionate and powerful presence.


The Kingdom and the Power and the Glory

One day, while praying, “Yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever,” I realize that I’m thinking, not Yours is, but Yours will be.  I’m looking to the far-off future in awe and wonder, anticipating that day when God really will have the kingdom and the power and the glory.  As if He doesn’t have them right now.


Right Where I Am

The amazing thing isn’t that God did whatever He did to protect my house last night.  He’s God.  He can do things like that without hardly thinking about it.  The amazing thing is that He reached down to me in my weakness.


Creation’s Legacy

Experiencing awe: recognizing that the living things around me aren’t just “nature”—they’re direct descendants of the ones God spoke into existence millennia ago; meeting Peggy, knowing that she’s a direct descendant of Abraham and Sarah.


Stressing Out

When I’m feeling frustrated by my difficulty thinking I wonder, is it my age?  Am I hitting the dreaded days of dementia?  Or am I being lazy?  Do I just need to try a little harder?  The stress increases as I struggle with fear and self-condemnation.


The Blessing of Beauty

When I’m struggling with stress and surrounded by suffering, beauty has a calming and uplifting effect.


New Opportunities

I’ve been a Christian for so long, it seems like it should be easier by now.  How is it that I can feel so disoriented, so confused, so uncertain about how to respond to the challenges that I face today?


God Leads Me

I don’t want a God who deliberately leads me into suffering. I want a God who only leads me to sunny pastures and soothing waters. Or do I?


Beg Them to Stay

A young Christian man tells me the story of rescuing a friend who’s been given a date rape drug during a fraternity/sorority party.


Failing Like Jonah

God used His prophet’s flagrant disobedience and rebellion to offer salvation for all eternity to men who might not have that opportunity otherwise.  He brought the greatest good from the darkest evil.  He brought the possibility of salvation to those who were lost, as a direct result of the sin of one of His servants.


The Blessing of Tears

I hate crying.  It’s wet and messy, and it feels like a total loss of control. Then one day during the pandemic shutdowns, the tears well up and I can’t hold them back. But with them comes a pleasant surprise.


Wrestling With Identity

Wrestling with my identity eventually leads to thinking about how I see myself versus how God sees me, and I realize that my physical appearance isn’t so important after all.


Send Me

As a teenager and new believer, I often echoed Isaiah’s words, “Here I am, send me!” Lord, I’ll go anywhere, do anything, sacrifice my all for you. Now I know better.

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